Running...

I don't know about you but every time I sin I automatically want to run as far away from God as possible. (I know that this is not just me, it is a habit that started long ago with Adam and Eve in the garden. They sort of messed up everything didn't they?) When I screw up, I go through all sorts of phases, justifying sin, twisting facts until I convince myself that I actually didn't mess up, etc. Thing is I always run as fast as i can away from God. Ya see when I am in the presence of God there is NO way I can justify sin. There is absolutely no way I can twist the truth. God is truth and perfect. In the presence of God, I have to face everything that is human in me. The problem with running from God is that it gets me exactly that, farther and farther away from my Savior, from my reason for living, from my Father. If I am truly saved by Christ being away from God should make me miserable. So I come back with my tail in between my legs feeling lower than Satan himself, and then He strikes me dead...not exactly He ends up giving me a speech like this "Reagan why do you think I died for you? Do you think I didn't know you would mess up? I died because I love you! You will never ever be enough or measure up but I never asked that of you. I asked that you would lean on me and trust me to be enough to cover your unholiness with my holiness. I told you I would make the weak strong and I will. I asked that when you mess up, you run to me and let me heal you, and then use those scars to bring me glory. I asked that you stop looking at your faults and your uncleanliness and look at the cross and the love that is there for you." How many times have I heard this? Countless times, but every time I hear it I am dumbfounded and brought to tears. God's love is enough. He died for me so that when i make a mess of my life I can run to Him and His blood can redeem me. With a promise like that, I think we should keep on running... but this time into His arms instead of away.